The Bluffer - Red Bluff, CA
Issue link: https://www.ifoldsflip.com/i/129400
Staff Editorial Page 2 The RIGHT way to ask a girl to prom... From rose petals to songs, and elaborate posters to tacky food, prom season is always kicked off with interesting and creative prom proposals. This year in particularly, the boys really outdid themselves. However, if you really want a girl to go to prom with you and remember that moment of proposal for the rest of her life, you should really consider some new tactics. Just because we, The Bluffer Staff, have YOUR best interest in mind, we'll let you in on a few of our surefire, irreplaceable secrets. One of our favorite ideas is a classic one, and it goes as follows: Figure out which girl you want to ask, and find out where she lives. Next, sneak into her house in the middle of the night while she's sleeping. Put a chloroform-soaked napkin on her mouth/nose area. Tie up her limbs and ductape her mouth. Pick her up, and carry her to the trunk of your car. Drive to a nearby cliff, preferrably surrounded by blossoming trees and shrubs (the more romantic the scenery, the better). After dragging her seemingly lifeless body out of the trunk, carefully dangle her off the edge of the cliff. Face down. Shake her violently until she wakes up. Reveal the suprise rose petals at the bottom of the cliff (you will need to set these out ahead of time), arranged meticulously to form the word "PROM?" If you want to stand out above those cliche techniques of asking a girl to prom, we strongly encourage you to try this one out! May 3, 2013 This is just one option, however, because we have more ideas for you! This next technique we like to call the physical approach- Harry Potter style. Keep in mind, this idea takes some serious dedication and desire- but we assure you, it will be scarred in her mind forever. Take a razor blade (or for all the Harry Potter fans out there, a basilisk tooth) and sterilize it thoroughly. Next, carefully carve the words "PROM?" into the middle of your forehead. Be sure not to do this in the mirror, or it will come out backwards. Trust us, any true Harry Potter fan would enjoy seeing a boy with a giant scar on his forehead. We understand that this may take a toll on your body, but just think- do you really want to risk denial by writing on a common sign or poster? If you wish to add to the Harry Potter theme in addition to the scar aspect, you could say, "Would you like to Slytherin to prom with me?" You may also want to get a reverse nose job to play into the Voldermort aspect of Harry Potter, though this may be taking it a bit too far. We hope these tips come in handy, and that you appreciate them, because until now, they have always been a cherished Bluffer secret. Do not settle for anything less than the best, and if you want to be the best, you really should consider utilizing a technique as memorable and impacting as the ones we mentioned! Times are changing, and the time has come to take prom season to a whole new level. Expansion of in askingmind the questions The key to a free mind lies W hile growing up into adulthood is a difficult task that we all must face, one thing we must keep is an open mind. The first step to this is to break the brainwash of humanity. We must, as Jim Morrison said, "Break on Through to the Other Side". The other side, where real reality lies outside of our fogged up minds. Think for yourself, that is what we are told, but at young ages we are programmed what to think. In fact, just in our generation we are brought up into materialism, and this ugly face drags along with it a lust for money. Money controls what we do, and is what we do it for. These are just petty human problems. There are many ways to expand the mind. It can be obtained by reading, writing, music, traveling, exploring, listening, asking questions, decide to accept our wrongs. Facing fears is a beautiful thing, to be successful as a living being we must overcome fear. It doesn't matter how much money you make, how many friends you have, how cool you look, if you cannot overcome fear, you are weak and scared. This is how fear controls us. Expansion of the mind is a vast topic, I have only covered a few things I have found in my own experiences as a growing organism in this beautiful world stained by human greed. Owen Ritter and through in taking certain mind altering substances. These outlets lead you through the doors of perception. Don't believe everything you hear, it is so important to question authority, to question what you have been raised to know as truth. Do as you please within your own morals, be your own person. In my own personal account I have found that physical experiences are the most mind expanding. Experiences that have to do with our five senses have become eye opening. You must intake and examine Teen drinking and safety I don't think that teen drinking is a good idea. A lot of teens today do drink, but it doesn't make you cool. There are too many accidents for drinking to be worth the risk. You're brain doesn't develop until the age of 25 and why would you want to mess up and opportunity in life? When you are 21 you will have plenty of time to drink for the rest of your life, so wait. I think parents make a big deal about teen drinking because their teen is not telling them about it. Most teens don't tell their parents because they don't want them to worry, or thing to do then is to gather up the keys, put them somewhere where only a couple of people know, and not give them back until 9:30 the next morning. That way no one is going to risk getting in an accident, and you can also drink all night long without worrying about when you need to go home. get mad at them. Trust goes both ways. Talking to your parents is a good thing, if they don't talk to you first, you start the conversation. They will appreciate you talking to them about it because that's what brings trust in our family. If you are going to drink you might as well drink responsibly. Having a designated driver is a good was to get home but do you really know that they have not had anything to drink? Another good idea is to have a sleep over. With that, a good THE BLUFFER Editorial Staff Adviser Editor-In-Chief Editor-In-Chief Advertising Director Natalie Almond Alisa Pelanconi Marissa Chase News Editors Laurel Shoop Marissa Chase Viewpoint Editor Staff Writers Cartoonist Becca Blanchard Veronica Smith Mitch Fox Andrea Hveem A & E Editors Sarah Bartlett Claire Samay Karla Nowicki Connor Ross Sam Rodriguez Tymberlyn Bealer Josiah Vasey Rodrigo Sanchez Mark Criss Features Editors Alexis Simpkins Ceighlee Fennel Ashlan Brunello Aleczander X. B. Sims Hunter Latham Bailey Patchen Zachary Smith Aaron Lewis Sports Editors Sahvanna Rice Owen Ritter Egan Meagher Julia Liebert Garrett Sandow Ryan Fisher Topics Editors Shelby Keeler Laurel Shoop Editorial Policy: Opinions expressed are not necessarily those of the district, staff, or student body. We welcome signed letters to the editor. Names may be withheld upon request. We also reserve the right to edit submission based on length and/or clarity. Julia Liebert Staff Writer everything that comes your way and interpret it. Everything that you do has lessons in life and can teach us what to do, it all depends on if we see these lessons our brain sends us, whether we Staff writer Bad choices create memorable stories I n life people make stupid decisions. Some more than others, but some choices are just plain funnier and entertaining. On the upside, depending on what happened, it could be really funny, but me laughing could make me just as immature as the person who acted first. Those who make funny decisions and are trying to make a joke can be hilarious. Such as the class clown making a snide comment to the teacher and getting kicked out of class. All that the classmates see is that he is a funny guy. But seriously, that person probably went to principal's office, probably got a call home and maybe sent home from the day. He got a zero on any assignments that were assigned that day and lost respect from the teacher. Is that kid really cool now? It may be funny, but it's not worth it. From my experience, I have made quite a few mistakes myself, but without those mistakes I wouldn't be who I am today. Try and take every chance you can, live a life to its fullest but not a life full of regret. Decision making is kind of serious; but whether it is bad or good, that is up to you. Sahvanna Rice Staff Writer SPARTAN THUMBS School year is almost over Students are getting excited for the nearing summer. The block schedule is over Two hours is just too much time for some classes. There is too much testing Math, science, English and history are too much. Spring sports are doing well Spring sports are doing well as their seasons come to a close. Final exams are nearing There are just 4 weeks to make up your grade until finals. These thumbs came from Mr. Hein's 4th period class.