The O-town Scene - Oneonta, NY
Issue link: https://www.ifoldsflip.com/i/29255
Keep Up Now! By Terry Ludwig Love yourself first “Love is the single fiber that measures my common thread into the fabric of humanity. Our struggles seem of object difference. I suspect my journey to arrive at this surprising revelation was ironically one of utter seclusion. Culminating, eventually after years of preparation; in a carefully conceived and orchestrated, but mysteriously interrupted unsuccessful attempt to end my torturous existence here _ all the while shutting out those who loved me. I know now that too served this plan, for more desolate was my existence without them.” _ Rob Ludwig Imagine, for a moment, you are in the presence of the “love of your life.” Your attention is focused on your beloved’s beauty and captivating voice. You are completely engaged. You feel loved beyond mea- sure, utterly cherished, wholly sustained; you are joyful. Your entire being feels valued, cared for and safe. You are in a state of bliss. You are loved. You have the support, strength and power to do anything you choose! Doesn’t it feel wonder- ful? What if I told you, you are in the presence of your beloved every day? All you have to do is gaze in the mir- ror and pronounce, “I Love You”! If you looked at yourself and could see your radiance, your beauty, your infinite strength and wisdom each time you gazed into the mirror, your life would change dramatically! Gone would be the self-doubts, self-pity, feelings of worthless- ness and guilt. Instead, you would see your radiance and unlimited power to create happiness and abundance. Life is no joke; it’s tough. It’s a struggle to get up in the morn- ing and go out there and face the world day after day. People aren’t nice, promises aren’t kept, and you have grown weary, aggravated, disappointed and leery. These negative emotions bind the heavy chains to your soul and keep you in darkness. Your inner darkness becomes the projection of your world. The darker your soul, the more you dislike the world; and the more you loathe yourself. Only you hold the key. Unlock the chains you have bound yourself with, preventing you from living the life you’ve dreamed of; the happy life you were meant to live. You were intended to love. Don’t keep the people who love you at bay. Start today. Be Love; love yourself! “Keep up Now! with the stream of higher consciousness and stay connected to the Source.” —Terry Ludwig Terry Ludwig’s brother, Rob, passed away in 2004 after bat- tling AIDS. Before he passed, he shared his message. “Keep Up Now!” is the result of that communication. She can be reached at keepupnow@gmail.com, and followed on Twitter and Face- book. Open mind to experiences of others On March 21, I had another moving ex- perience at the Identity Play Reading Series at SUNY Oneonta. The Identity Play Reading Series aims to bring plays into the community that we should know about, producing emotionally charged, ad-hoc performances that shine light on our differences. What started as a small gathering of campus staff and students over a year ago has grown into a crowd of 100+ campus and community members for each performance. I was nervous and excited when I sat down to watch this par- ticular play. ... It was on autism, and I knew next to nothing about it. I have heard the word autism thrown around, but I never understood what it meant; I assumed that autism meant a re- duced capacity for thought and understand- ing, but it turns out I had less than 1 percent of the picture. The reading I watched was “Autistic License,” written by Stacey Dinner- Levin and co-directed by Chloejean Tedford and David Marr III, two students at SUNY Oneonta. Dinner-Levin‘s son has a form of high- functioning autism, and the play is a per- sonal account of the obstacles that surface when autism enters her life without a knock on the door. Although the play has a few preachy moments, and others that are just sound bytes of information condensed to help the audience understand autism, it is a work-in-progress that still delivers the raw, unfiltered emotions. The characters are nameless, which I think keeps the focus on the concepts surrounding autism and not specific places and people. Mom, Child and Dad, played by Barby Kahl, Billy Rothwell and Drew Kahl, respec- tively, are the central characters on which all others play into and out of the scenes. The emotional depth achieved by the Kahls was stunning, given that everyone was reading lines from scripts. During the post- reading talk, the Kahls shared with us they have a son with a form of high-functioning autism, and experienced events similar to that of Dinner-Levin. Their experience with autism gave a passion to the performance that was palpable and caused the audience to develop very quick and personal relation- ships with the play’s nameless characters. One surprise performance came from Rothwell. As I said before, I understood next to nothing about autism before watching this reading, but I began to see the surface of one perspective of it through this perfor- mance. After the reading, Rothwell shared with the audience that his experience with autism comes from his mother and her students, some of whom have some form of autism. It was strange to watch him play this seemingly immature child, but that’s when I realized I was one of the people that Dinner-Levin wrote about, someone who did not understand. There were several touching moments in the show, three of which stood out to me. The first was when the Child’s younger brother asked the Mother if “they could Guest Column take the autism out” of the Child; you could literally hear the audience experience Moth- er’s pain. The second was when the Child wandered away from home and the Mother had a very serious, albeit brief, thought about how things might go back to normal if the Child never came back. That was a very real and daring moment, and it gave the audience pause to come to terms with what she said. Many people have thoughts that border on what the Mother said, or worse, yet few people talk about those thoughts out of fear, or something else. It was a brave and honest move by Dinner-Levin to expose herself and audience. The third moment that stuck out for me was something that many of us have experience with, even if it doesn’t involve autism. The Mother was having trouble with the Child in the supermarket when he wanted her to buy something and she refused to do so, causing him to have a fit. We’ve all seen that. When another mother in the super- market reacts negatively to Child behav- ing so poorly, the Mother says something like, “My son’s acting this way because of his autism, what’s your excuse?” It hit the issue of I-don’t-know-you-but-I’m-going- to-judge-you-and-your-child right on the nose. I have scoffed at the behavior of other people’s children, but until this play it was never thrown in my face that I clearly do not understand what led up to those incidents. This reading exposed me to autism and to some of the biases I carry. Those realiza- tions are the invaluable asset that the Identity Play Reading Series provides to the community. We should do these plays, fully staged and with large audiences, but if we do not stage full productions, at least a few hundred people are shown how different we all are, and why that is not a problem. I want to learn more about what makes us different, so I do not find myself judging those differences. —Kyle Beckley Kyle Beckley is a theater reviewer for the O-Town Scene, and the coordinator of electronic and social media at the Research Founda- tion of the State University of New York at SUNY Oneonta. April 14, 2011 O-Town Scene 15 the Diversity Scene April 14-21