The Milwaukee Post

18 • Milwaukee Post • June 28, 2013 NEWS OF THE WEIRD BY CHUCK SHEPHERD Lead story ■ Storage cloudburst. The executive in charge of the electronic infrastructure of Facebook confirmed to London's information-technology website The Register in June that when the company inaugurated its first "cloud" data-storage facility in Prineville, Ore., in 2011, the equipment was "drenched" when an actual cloud formed inside the building. (Facebook had only "hinted" previously at a Prineville "humidity event," according to The Register.) The tall, huge building's cooling units use an electricity-saving system that takes air from the outside (rather than re-circulated indoor air) and subjects it to various humidity levels to cool the heat coming from the aisles of computer servers. Apparently, engineers had not accurately anticipated the vapor condensation profile of the new system, and rain guards were promptly installed. Can't possibly be true ■ In May, only two states away from last year's mass shooting at an Aurora, Colo., movieplex, management at the Goodrich Capital 8 Theaters in Jefferson City, Mo., hired a man dressed in full tactical gear and carrying guns resembling M-4 rifles and 9mm pistols (as "S.H.I.E.L.D." operatives) to greet patrons for the opening of the new "Iron Man" movie. Police were not pleased by the barrage of frightened 911 callers who were fearful that Aurora was happening all over again. Capital 8 manager Bob Wilkins said that "hundreds" of customers were entertained by the publicity stunt and that "only a few" were upset. ■ Since Rozie, a pregnant Asian elephant at Albuquerque's ABQ BioPark Zoo, stands a better chance of a healthy birth if she is strong, the "elephant manager" and staff have been putting her through twice-a-day, Pilates-type exercises (featuring leg lifts, squats, and other calisthenics). (Rozie is due sometime between August and November.) Lest anyone worry that Rozie is being mistreated, the elephant manager noted in a May press release that her participation "is completely voluntary." Inexplicable ■ As John Jacobson, 20, was being booked into jail in Portland, Ore., in May (for allegedly trying to steal a case of beer from a Plaid Pantry grocery store), police discovered a live mouse in his pocket. Jacobson had his father come down to the jail and take custody of the mouse. ■ Christie's auction house in New York City reported that a May 15th sale of a painting of the late actress Bea Arthur – nude from the waist up – by the artist John Currin in 1991 had sold for $1.9 million. Currin said that he made the painting from a photograph of Arthur clothed, and Arthur, known for her roles in TV's "Maude" and "Golden Girls," appears younger in face and body in the painting than on the TV shows. ■ Maryland state troopers caught sight of a drummer rocking out on the shoulder of Interstate 695 near Windsor Mill Road in Baltimore on May 21st, at about 10:30 a.m. According to the troopers, the man had run out of gas and had decided to set up his drum kit to practice while he waited for assistance. When a utility truck arrived, supplying gasoline, the drummer packed up and resumed his travels. The aristocrats ■ (1) New York state Assemblyman Vito Lopez of Brooklyn was briefly a candidate for New York City mayor but withdrew in May, shortly after a state ethics commission accused him of various "unbecoming" behaviors, including pressuring female assistants to massage him, and at least one to feel the cancer-striken Lopez's tumors on his neck, shoulder, and armpit. (2) Philip Garcia, 41, was arrested in April in Perris, Calif., after he allegedly crawled naked through the doggy door in a neighboring home and announced to the female resident that he was there for sex. Least competent criminals ■ Recurring themes: (1) A 38-year-old man was arrested in Wichita, Kan., in June and charged with trying to rob a Spangles restaurant by presenting a cashier with a demand note. He was arrested a short time later – and easily, because the demand for money was written on the back of a check-reorder form that contained his name and address. (2) Joseph Meacham, 39, fleeing on foot during a mid-afternoon traffic stop in Clayton, Mo., in May, ran through town so indiscriminately that when he decided to duck into a building for cover, he failed to realize it was the St. Louis County Police Headquarters. He was found curled into a ball on the floor in a deadend hallway, and promptly arrested. Perspective ■ The web sites OpposingViews.com and the Jewish Daily Forward (Forward.com), sweeping through all of the 2013 news accounts that two reporters could find, added up the fatalities so far this year (through May) of Americans killed by domestic "terrorist" attacks, compared to the number of Americans killed with guns fired by toddlers (aged 2-6). Terrorism's total: 4 (all from the Boston Marathon bombing). Gun deaths by toddlers: 11. (During the same period, 10 additional Americans were merely wounded by toddlers firing guns.) Send your Weird News to Chuck Shepherd, P.O. Box 18737, Tampa, FL., 33679 or by email to WeirdNewsTips@yahoo.com. HINTS FROM HELOISE BY HELOISE Can shells see U.S. shores? Dear Heloise: I have a vacation planned to a foreign beach, and I would like to bring home some seashells. Do you know if you are allowed to bring seashells back into the United States? – A Reader in Virginia Yes, you are, but there are some guidelines. According to U.S. Customs and Border Protection, seashells usually are allowed into the United States, with a few stipulations: ■ They must not be from endangered or threatened species. ■ They must be completely clear of creatures, sand, soil, etc. ■ A traveler may bring only a small amount for personal use. ■ Stones and pebbles also are acceptable in small quantities, following the same guidelines. Here is a hint for cleaning shells. When you get back to the hotel, fill the tub with hot water and add some hair shampoo, which usually is in the room. Soak for a while, and use a clean washcloth or hairbrush to scrub away sand, dirt and grime, then rinse thoroughly . Know that all of these items must be declared with customs when entering the United States. You should check with authorities at your destination about any regulations they have. Also, be careful: Even if you buy an item in a shop, it does not mean you will be allowed to bring it into the U.S. – Heloise Send a great hint to Heloise, P.O. Box 795000, San Antonio, Texas 78279-5000 or email to heloise@Heloise.com. Answers on Page 23

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