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office or work through lunch because there's always more to do. Using your calendar effectively can help you with boundaries. Villalobos says once you put "play" into your schedule, it helps to get people who are important in your life to keep you committed. For example, she blocks out three hours twice a week on her calendar to paint. She has asked her boyfriend to help her stick to that schedule. Realistically, there will be times when you have to reschedule a fun activity because of work demands. "At least you know what you missed so if you don't do it, you move it to another day," Villalobos said. If you're in a relationship, experts advise letting your partner participate in creating your calendar. A friend of mine sends his spouse an electronic invite to his poker night signaling that she has the night free to schedule her own fun activity. Scheduling everything may seem rigid. "That's the opposite," Villalobos said. "By put- Q& A ting things on your calendar, you can focus on what you need to do in the moment. It allows you to be far more present." With more people converting to electronic calendars or hovering between paper and online options, how we coordinate our schedules is in flux. But for balance, it's often better to track personal and professional in one place. Sharon Teitelbaum, a Bostonbased work-life coach, says to calendar all important life events, including birthdays. It may sound like common sense to calendar your son's birthday, but people forget and schedule business travel, she has found. She also advises putting work events in your calendar as far in advance as possible and tasks that lead up to them. "You don't want to agree to host a dinner party the weekend before a work retreat." For many busy people, the traditional way of scheduling needs to change from calendaring a due date to creating a timeline. If you have a big project you need to have completed by Feb. 15, Teitelbaum suggests breaking it into weekly tasks leading up to that date. "People vastly underestimate how long things take and the number of interruptions they have to contend with," said says. Julie Morgenstern, who created the Balanced Life Planner for Levenger, an office products company, says that even on a daily basis people don't plan realistically. "By bravely recognizing the limits of each day and how long each to-do on your list will take, we can see in advance what will or won't fit into our calendar, and become more strategic," she said. Because our attention spans are shorter, Morgenstern says we need to schedule with that in mind and "break down our work into smaller pieces to fit the smaller windows of time within which we can focus." For example, if you have a sixhour project, break it into a series of six one-hour steps. "It's easier to resist distractions when you have something specific and measurable to focus on for an hour at a time." Computer systems developer and blogger Chris Skoyles advocates a nontraditional see BALANCING ACT . . . page 6 Applicants hit another reference-checking barrier By Diane Stafford The Kansas City Star (MCT) A final step in the hiring process is for candidates to arrange personal reference If you haven't been in a job hunt lately, you have no calls with former supervisors as well as others we idea how things have may choose. changed. Let that sink in. You, the Let me say right up front candidate, will be required that the best way to get a job is still through personal to do what hirers themselves have found that they contacts. That's how you avoid some of the screening can't do – get good reference comments from your tactics that are shocking past employers. some applicants. And why is that? Because One of the surprises is the very same human being required to present resource department that is your W-2 form from last year to proceed in the inter- requiring you to set up your own reference interviews view process. It's a way for employers to see your salary has told its employees that they aren't supposed to give history and whether it fits out any substantive referwith their budgets and ence information to other expectations. Another shocker was sent see APPLICANTS . . . page 6 to me by Brian, a job hunter who will remain othVolume 15 • Number 22 erwise anonymous. Here's a sentence verbatim from a February 7, 2013 job posting he was considering: Classified Sales Director: Make new year a time for reflecting, not resolving By Liz Reyer Star Tribune (Minneapolis) (MCT) As we move into a new year, it's customary for many to make resolutions. Bad habits we'll break; good behaviors we'll adopt. It's all wellintended but seldom leads to lasting positive change. Instead, at its worst, it can reinforce a belief that change is too difficult and even yield a sense of failure. Not quite the way to start the year. Yet reflection upon the new year can lead to growth from past experiences and positive momentum for the future.This year, instead of a focus on "doing," put your focus on "being." Consider the past year, taking out judgment of good and bad, noticing all that transpired.You may see things that you'd have done differently, and you may see things you consider successes. In both cases, accept them, learn from them if you can, and then let them go. Now shift your emphasis to the presence that you've brought to the year. Have you brought joy? Anger? Serenity? Impatience? Again, assess this without judgment, taking care to be compassionate to yourself. Finally, think about how actions and presence are interwoven. How has your presence in any moment been caused by your actions? Conversely, what actions have your underlying presence brought forth? For example, if you see that you've been irritable, you may notice that it may be associated with working too much. Or you may notice that if you don't exercise on a certain day, you feel irritable. If you would value being more even in your disposition, these insights lead to logical steps to assess your career or to prioritize getting regular exercise. At this point it would be easy to fall into the trap of making resolutions:"I'm going to exercise every day because then I feel better." Back away from this rigid approach! Instead, place your attention on being self-aware.As you go through the next year, take the time to notice how you're feeling, how you're being, and then what you're doing. Pay attention to how you affect others, and let your values drive your actions, bringing consciousness to your day-to-day life. Finally, as a general offering for the next year, I can't top the words of my friend Mary Drew, who writes: I hope that the holiday season and the new year are full of childlike wonder for you.That: • Your family and loved ones make you feel good (and that you reciprocate). • Your family and loved ones pro- vide something for you to smile/laugh about (and that you reciprocate). • You enjoy the anticipation of waiting for something exciting to happen. • You have or will soon embrace some new experiences. • You can claim an accomplishment. • You experience some kind of "masterpiece." • You experience a pleasant surprise now and again. • You give and receive unexpected compliments from time to time. • You deal well in spite of unavoidable unpleasantness. • You give yourself a well-deserved break from work,"have to's," guilt, or whatever is causing high stress in your life. • You receive love from and give kindness to all who pass your way. Liz Reyer is a credentialed coach with more than 20 years of business experience. Her company, Reyer Coaching & Consulting, offers services for organizations of all sizes. Submit questions or comments about this column at www.deliverchange.com/coachscorner or email her at lizdeliverchange.com. 2 GREATERmilwaukeeJOBS • February 7, 2013 A publication of Conley Media ... from page 1 GREATERmilwaukeeJOBS Balancing Act Kristi Wolf 262/670-1516 Account Executive: Donna Armstrong 262/513-2698 darmstrong@conleynet.com Story Coordinator: Dwayne Butler 262/513-2626 dbutler@conleynet.com Production: Patricia Scheel 262/513-2690 Distributed by: Conley Distribution 262-513-2646 ©2004 by Conley Media Waukesha County Independent and Locally Owned GREATERmilwaukeeJOBS is published weekly by Conley Media – Waukesha County, 801 N. Barstow St., Waukesha, WI 53186. Contents of this publication may not be reproduced in any form without the written consent of the publisher. 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